Archive for April, 2015

You get to play cards.

Posted: 2015-04-30 in Uncategorized

Your get to play cards and/or chess intellectually in between being raped banally/brutally – how bad is your life?

Perhaps in another time and place the variant involves gin rummy and dinner parties, then the lights are switched off and you get violated.

How old did you say you are?

And this is where you are in life?

How immature are you?

Hey, since I plan on living well past 500 years, I figure I’m still in my infancy. So, get over it and give me a chance to grow, get into the groove.

The pain and hurt, it only came after interaction with others. Ditto, the self-loathing. And when self-loathing sets in, no words can do justice to the feeling, the pain. Now my silence is filled with the voices of others, demons, hateful pricks.

29 and counting.

Posted: 2015-04-27 in Uncategorized

Abortions & Oxygen Starvation. The Ferris wheel still stands as a mocking indictment on human folly.

29.

Posted: 2015-04-26 in Uncategorized

Radonitsa was on Tuesday.

Thursday was something very particular for me.

Then there was Saturday, Anzac Day, 100 years on. And the centenary of the beginning (really?) of the Armenian Genocide.

The day after Anzac Day it continues. This really is a week to remember the dead.

The day after. A kind of nightmare remembered. A haunting of invisible, yet glowing, terror. Insidious killer, despicable man-made pestilence. The wind carried it; stone and bones drank it in.

Soon thereafter, everyone who could moved as far away as they could. My family included. You could call us all a kind of modern-day diaspora. Some of us blossomed into beautiful flowers, other didn’t, some remain in the balance. Nevertheless, regardless of the distance, the fear stays with us, even if we can manage to compartmentalize it into a corner of our minds. The memories are clear (if sometimes hazy). The word on the ground no one wants to hear is cancer, where the sun never seems to shine. And… And, this is an incomplete story, the containment is incomplete.

And even beautiful flowers sooner or later wither – environmental forces take a toll, whether you offer it willingly or not.

Anzac Day.

Posted: 2015-04-25 in Uncategorized

Women stripping naked at the funeral, paid to pay tribute, and “entertain” the mourners. Wow. Weird. But, yeah, I want some of that!

The all-girl marching band, miniskirts and boots. They make some noise. Dawn Service tomorrow. Gotta pay respect. Nation’s been solidified.

Meanwhile, in Dodge City, 2 million Christians are murdered by the Turks. Some Anzacs witness, hardly entertaining. But now President Obama feels unable to declare the fact. Sad.

Urban Terrorism.

Posted: 2015-04-24 in Uncategorized

Dog shit on the ground and lights left on too long. Cars parked on the street, opposite your driveway, obstructing, destroying, balls kicked around. Children, adults, which is worse? Voices loud and jolting. Hell on Earth. People.

Compromise.

Posted: 2015-04-23 in Uncategorized

Do what you gotta do. Be what you gotta be. Yeah. Survive today. Hope for a better tomorrow, somehow.

Pending.

Posted: 2015-04-22 in Uncategorized

Pending. Yes, good things will come forward, they’re there in the invisible realm already, I just need to reach deeper into myself to pull them out and manifest them physically. Keep reading, keep waiting. One day it will all make sense and liberate.

Trust me, read to the end: it won’t be like one of those awesome TV series eps that gets sullied by the commercial voice-over during the oh-so-moving end credits.

Jive with my vibe: I respect, you respect, we develop, and the war is won in our minds.

Judge.

Posted: 2015-04-21 in Uncategorized
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The Judge is tired of appraising you, you sick fuck. He/she has nothing more to say.  (You disgust him/her, he/she is sick of you, all of you…)