Archive for the ‘Existential Angst’ Category

Flower Blows, Hope_

As is natural among the desperate

(which is to say, most of us),

she reads too much into the other’s gesture.

Hope springs, somewhat eternal,

beyond inevitable;

we don’t *truly* want to believe infernal.

 

(To be continued…)

       

©SvetkaSamizdat

 

 

 

 

 

Hole In Wall

That thing which I seemed to brush off yesterday,

haunts and taunts me today,

makes me less likely to…

Do anything tomorrow.

 

(To be continued…)

       

©SvetkaSamizdat

 

 

 

 

 

Fingerprints (Schwarz & Rot)

Pain seeps soul away;

or maybe it’s who we are:

sum experience.

 

(To be continued…)

       

©SvetkaSamizdat

 

 

 

 

 

Cuckoo Clock, Crooked, Kucku

Time marches on,

relentlessly, mercilessly, mockingly.

Time evaporates,

desecrates, eviscerates, obliterates.

Hope, gone.

Resistance, futile.

Tomorrow, die, or do it all again.

 

(To be continued…)

       

©SvetkaSamizdat

 

 

 

 

 

Fetal Position 1

It starts with a myriad of thoughts,

brain-flooding, torrent of negativity.

Then, all-consuming agony,

radiating from my head

to my everything.

I drift in & out of consciousness,

transitioning into a throbbing nothingness,

where pain overwhelms, totally,

making thought beyond the agony’s essence

impossible.

… This is existence?

 

(To be continued…)

       

©SvetkaSamizdat

 

 

 

 

 

Vremya, broken

That thing which worked yesterday no longer seems to

(another thing to add to the list!).

It probably can be fixed, but it’ll cost,

and I’d have to know the right people.

Simultaneously, another set of demands assert primacy,

as always, like maniacal chirping birds, dementing,

and fatigue is overwhelming.

… I can only fight so many battles, right? …

Alas, much like Jurgis’ leaking roof, it’ll continue to mock:

another broken object, machine,

another piece of me.

 

(To be continued…)

       

©SvetkaSamizdat

 

 

 

 

 

Paper Sheet_ Dirty, Messy 1

I turned over a new page,

decided on a fresh start,

determined to do …

But, alas, the new page was soon as messy as all the previous,

confused, complicated, compromised, attempts.

 

(To be continued…)

       

©SvetkaSamizdat

 

 

 

 

 

Luna, Solar Corona, i Venera 2

O Venera!

How I admire your detached, distant enlightenment.

Your silent wisdom inspires, when I am receptive,

more precisely, when I am allowed.

Glorious Venera!

You are not moved by the evils of this world and its people,

but they wreck havoc on each other,

day by day destroying, it feels,

me.

O Venera!

If I believed praying to you would make things right,

and lighten my burden,

I absolutely would,

if only I could …

Alas.

O Venera, you are faithful,

I am human, pained and confused,

forgive me.

 

(To be continued…)

       

©SvetkaSamizdat

 

 

 

 

 

Chandra Crab

I’ve said it before, or something similar:

To speak is to be misunderstood.

And yet, humanity continues in its futility,

attempting to communicate,

with people either unable or unwilling to understand.

In our conceit, we believe that other people want to know and/or care.

And so we speak. Words. Deep and meaningful. A piece of soul, blowing in the wind. Words. Disappearing, soon to be forgotten, another banality will steal slender attention.

Every word, as a breath lost, given up to a relentless fire …

Gone, ultimately we tire,

oxygen starvation,

silence embrace.

Death. (or is this peace true life?)

 

(To be continued…)

       

©SvetkaSamizdat

 

 

 

 

 

Dzhentileski_ Melankholiya

*I*, am struggling with today.

*They*, are talking about tomorrow, excited and relishing prospects.

I want to forget anything beyond the past.

 

(To be continued…)

       

©SvetkaSamizdat