Archive for the ‘Hikikomori’ Category

It’s midnight already…


And the Sun has set over Mount Asahi.

I look North.

And my computer has frozen,

glacial movements,

Hokkaido feeling.


Each morning I don’t

presuppose the worst will be,

pray, stability.


It’s been a long day, a long week, long month, year, decade, century…


It’s been a long life,

it feels like I’ve been alive forever,

constant drudgery, pain, frustration, betrayal, compromise,

and I feel fucking tired.

All I want to do is pleasure myself and sleep,

curl up into the fetal position and embrace nothingness,

in a totally dark room, sensory-deprivational bliss.

It’s been a long day in a long life

and yet, I ask myself, have I actually lived?



Posted: 2016-03-12 in Anja, Blick!, Hikikomori

Unappealing vista out every window I see (trash, trash conditions, trash people).

Sure, the windows are dirty, smeared with pollution and weather,

but, really?

No attraction to venture out whatsoever.

Oz? Hah!

Is this my lot?

Life inside?

A prison cell,

no more desire to break out.

Might as well be…